One Year

It has been one year since I answered the phone to hear my physician's somber tone.

It has been one year since I faced the fear of the unknown.

It has been one year since I burdened my family with the knowledge of my cancer diagnosis.

One year ago I learned that one does not 'get' cancer and then 'get rid of' cancer. Cancer is a journey of unknown duration and unknown destination. My journey is currently going well. I'm one year in and the professionals see no signs of cancer.

It has been one year since I stopped my bicycle mid ride to share my diagnosis with a cycling friend.

The most humbling aspect of my journey has been the tremendous support from family and friends. These people rushed to my aid. They cannot be thanked enough. I suspect their demonstration of love bolstered my spirits and resolve and gave me the strength to maintain the physical aspect of the fight.

It has been one year since I clicked out of the pedals and checked into the surgery center.

Cancer is a dirty trickster. I felt fine. I looked fine. I had the strength to pedal alongside the best. But cancerous cells were quietly undermining what was otherwise a well organized machine. Choosing surgery, and knowing that the pieces don't get reassembled exactly the same as they came apart, was the first of many bitter pills I needed to swallow and embrace.

It has been one year since my first recovery.

The healing process that followed the first of three procedures set me on my heels. It also helped me internalize just how long and draining the journey would become. While my surgery site slowly healed my determination and resolve slowly solidified. I needed both in the months that followed.

It has been one year since a friend first commented on my positivity in the face of a sour situation.

I have a lot of memories from the first month of my cancer journey. One of the most influential came from a friend who was surprised that I managed to keep my chin up. My positive attitude did not defeat cancer. It did allow me to have the best experience possible given the variables that were out of my control.

It has been one year since I shared cycling photos.

My eyes are looking forward. The cancer journey continues but is not currently the primary plot line of my story. Instead I'll be taking my days one by one, giving thanks for all I have, and taking in as many happy cycling days as the universe will allow me.

Adam and I at the Carbon River Bridge as photographed by Mike. Thanks, guys, for a great day of pedaling.

 

Adam and Mike pose next to my shadow at the Carbon River Bridge.